ChurchApplied

The Good and the Bad

Why is it that some people are good and others bad? Even in the same family we often see a stark difference between two siblings. One turns out good and the other bad. Is it simply a matter of two people making different choices, or is there more? Psychologists have come up with a theory called "relative deprivation" to try and explain these differences.

Making Choices - Photo: Stockxpert. All rights reserved.

"Psychologists uncovered a curious feature of military morale during World War II. Those in branches of the service handing out the most promotions complained the most about their rank. The investigators cited 'relative deprivation' as an explanation for the trend -- it's not what you have, but what you have compared with others in the same situation." (Science News, Dec. 7, 1991, Bruce Bower)

"Relative deprivation achieves a more profound influence through the daily battles and negotiations that constitute life in the nuclear family, maintain researchers in human behavioral genetics. Each child in a family harbors an exquisite sensitivity to his or her standing with parents, brothers and sisters, and thus essentially grows up in a unique psychological environment, according to these investigators. The result: Two children in the same family grow to differ from one another in attitudes, intelligence and personality as much as two youngsters randomly plucked from the population at large." (Science News, Dec. 7, 1991, Bruce Bower)

What researchers appear to be saying is that siblings are not the same because they each view their circumstances (even though they may be very similar) very differently. You may grow up with the same family and live in the same house as your brother or sister, but that doesn't mean you share their perceptions. 

Case In Point

"Do not be like Cain who belonged to the Evil One and killed his brother. And why did he kill him? Because the things Cain did were evil, and the things his brother did were good" (1 John 3:11-12) New Century Version

Why were Cain and Able so different. They were raised by the same parents and undoubtedly taught the same things about God. Yet, one wanted to please God and went out of his way to follow His instructions, and the other had an independent streak that took him off in a different direction. Obviously, their personal perceptions of God were quite different.

Because perception is an individual process, people do assign different meanings to similar stimuli. And due to perception, people in similar circumstances do form different opinions. Cain's perception of God influenced his behavior toward Him. He didn't believe God meant what He said. Or, he believed God meant what He said, but somehow thought that his actions not only met God's requirements, but actually improved upon them.

Presently, our perceptions of God are being influenced by what we think about this story. Like fresh concrete drying in the warm sun, our conclusions are being solidified and set. Was God fair with Cain? Did God push Cain toward evil by rejecting His sacrifice? Or, did Cain ruin his life by allowing his perceptions of God to take him down roads that were forbidden for his own good? We cannot know for sure. But one thing we can know is that how we handle the questions that may arise from this story affects our perceptions of God--which ultimately moves us either closer to, or farther away, from Him.

Ultimately, the only control we have over whether we are good or bad is in our willingness to allow God to shape our perceptions. Thus, my prayer must always be, "Lord, please give me a new heart. Change it and make it new."

"And I will give them singleness of heart and put a new spirit within them. I will take away their stony, stubborn heart and give them a tender, responsive heart.." (Ezekiel 11:19) New Living Translation

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Ordinary Miracles

When was the last time you saw a miracle? Really! We read in Scripture about Jesus healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind, even resurrecting people from the dead. But those kinds of things don't happen today--do they?

Visit to the Doctor - Stockxpert Photos. All rights reserved.

I can only imagine what it must have been like when, at the marriage feast in Cana, Jesus turned water into wine. That was truly a miracle that no one could argue with! It happened right before their very eyes.

Why don't miracles still happen today? If they do, they usually happen in some third world country that we hardly ever hear about. They don't seem to be happening in Los Angeles, New York City, or even Topeka, Kansas.

Does God choose not to perform miracles in our midst today because He knows we wouldn't appreciate them for what they are? Is it because we don't have enough faith?

In Matthew 9:22 we find the story of the woman who was healed by touching Jesus' garment. After she touched Him, Jesus turned to her and said, "Daughter, take courage; your faith has made you well." Maybe if we had more faith we would see more miracles. Maybe we have forgotten what it means to believe.

Another possibility is that miracles are happening all around us, but we simply don't view them as such. If that's the case then maybe we need to have our "eyes" examined.

Merriam-Webster defines miracles in this way:

1 : an extraordinary event manifesting divine intervention in human affairs

2 : an extremely outstanding or unusual event, thing, or accomplishment

3 : Christian Science - a divinely natural phenomenon experienced humanly as the fulfillment of spiritual law

The first two definitions have to do with sensational and extraordinary occurrences. When Moses saw the burning bush in the wilderness, that was an extraordinary event. When Balaam's donkey spoke to him on his way to curse God's people---that was an outstanding occurrence!

But notice the third definition, "a divinely natural phenomenon experienced humanly as the fulfillment of spiritual law." That's quite different than the first two. Miracles that fit this definition may not appear as extraordinary or sensational, but they are still miraculous events because God intervenes to make them happen.

Today, when God carefully guides the surgeon's hands as he replaces a heart valve in a three-year old girl, is that a miracle? What if the surgeon is an unbeliever, yet the mother is praying for her little daughter. Can God still perform a miracle through that doctor? Can He use the surgeon without his permission to restore her back to health? I think so.

Is it not a miracle every time a new baby slips through the birth canal and lands in the hands of a mid-wife or physician? Where does this little bundle of cells and nerve endings come from? Sure, we can say that it's the result of a series of "natural" events, but isn't it still miraculous?

We might call it an "ordinary miracle" because it happens every day. But that doesn't make it less significant. It only means we have to be more attentive or else we'll miss seeing its splendor and wonder.

"God, please examine my 'eyes' today and give me the ability to see your awesome power at work. Thank you that miracles do still happen, and may one happen in my heart  just now."

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Where Are You?

Where do you live? As you ponder your response to this question try not to put too much weight on where your home is, or where you permanently reside.

Neighborhood - Photo by Sean Barley. All rights reserved.

It may have nothing to do with that. In fact, your answer may have more to do with your perception of reality than reality itself. Where is your heart? Where do your thoughts quickly go when they are freed from constraints? If you are like many, you may be having an out-of-body experience where you are physically in one place, but keep wishing you were in another. According to a recent Pew Research report, almost half of Americans wants to live somewhere else.

"The telephone survey of 2,260 adults conducted in October uncovers new attitudes and confirms age-old trends, including gaps in age, gender and political ideology..."

"46% would prefer to live in a different type of community from the one they now reside. Adults 50 to 64 who live in cities are the least likely to say they live in the ideal place; two-thirds of those in that age group who live in the country say they couldn't imagine living anywhere else."

"Young people are the opposite: 57% of urban dwellers younger than 30 say the city is where they want to live."¹

No matter where we are, it is tempting to think that it must be better someplace else. Either the weather is too hot, or too cold, or the local politics stinks, or the people are rude. There's always something that is missing. Years ago when Linda and I lived in Camarillo, California, we dreamed of the day when we could live farther out in the country--away from the crowds of people. Then when the opportunity came where we could actually move to the country, I, for one, found it a little too removed. There were not enough people. Sigh. Such is the human heart. It is never satisfied.

Over the years I've been learning the sacredness of space and place. I cannot say that I have fully arrived, but I have come to the point where I understand the importance of living where I am. Where I am may not be where I ultimately want to be, but until God leads me elsewhere, where I am is where I belong.

1. Read USA TODAY article

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Jesus Matters

Ultimately, the only thing that matters is Jesus! Seeing and knowing Him, following, obeying, sharing, and praising Him mean more than money, career, health, beauty, family or friends.

The top and bottom lines of life have to do with Jesus. He is the Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end (Rev.1: 8). Everything in-between that we buy, build and work so hard to posses will fade. The things we cherish, hold, and think we can keep forever can be lost in a wink. But Jesus remains.

Christmas Wreath - Photo by Studiomill. All rights reserved

Jesus matters because He is inexplicably tied to our origin, present well-being and future destiny. He matters because our daily response to His call moves us either closer or further away from finding our way through life's tangled maze.

While life may grace us with many wonderful relationships, Jesus is the only One we can count on at all times. He's simply always there!

When new beginnings fill us with excitement,
When kneeling over a silent grave,
When hard pressed for money,
When children leave home to find their way,
When words aren't enough,
When birthdays come and go,
When overwhelmed with joy,
When our best efforts seem wasted,
When our dreams come true,
When retirement begins,
When "friends" betray,
When death beckons,
When religion fails to satisfy . . . Jesus matters!

Jesus is more than a pacifier, emotional crutch, or "sugar daddy." He is the answer to every question, heartache and human desire. He alone can satisfy our hidden hunger and thirst.

This is why He says: "If anyone is thirsty, let him come to Me and drink. He who believes in Me, as the Scripture said, 'From his innermost being will flow rivers of living water.' " (John 7: 37, 38).

Jesus matters because "He who has the Son has the life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have the life" (1 John 5:12).

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Rest for the Weary

A few years ago I embarked on a project that was far more ambitious than I had imagined. For years I had wanted to replace the side door in my garage with a new one that actually closed and locked. Finally, one Sunday I decided it was time to act.

After going to Home Depot and choosing a new pre-hung door, a door knob and dead bolt lock, I headed home for the easy install. Seven hours later I was tired, thirsty and irritated--and still not done. In fact, when I went to bed that night I regretted ever starting the project. Let's just say there's a good reason I don't have a contractor's license.

Open door - Stockxpert Photos. All rights reserved.

The next day I called a friend who is a contractor to come over and help me out. The door looked pretty good, but I couldn't get it to latch properly. My friend took one look at it, made a couple of adjustments with a screw driver, and wallah! Everything was fine! I was shocked. How could he fix it so quickly after I had struggled for so many hours? Obviously, the difference was he knew what he was doing and I didn't.

Life presents us with many challenges that require more expertise than we have to offer. Often, we only admit this after spending fruitless hours of trying to fix something we know little or nothing about. When it comes to matters of the heart, Jesus is the only One who knows what to do. He says:

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls" (Matthew 11:28, 29). NASB

My Sunday project was motivated by the desire to have a new door that could be locked. The remedy for my heart hinges on my willingness to unlock the door so Jesus can enter to make the necessary adjustments.

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Givers and Getters

Recently, during my morning quiet time, a question stuck in my mind that begged to be answered. "What is the worst thing that could happen in your life?" What about the loss of a limb? Or worse yet, the loss of a family member? That is unimaginable. I don't want to even think about it. But aside from that, what would cause me the most grief? My answer may surprise you, because it did me.

Sharing Smiles - Dreamstime Stock Photos. All rights reserved.

I believe my greatest loss, aside from losing a family member, would be to be put in a position where I had nothing to give. Nothing to give. In this life, true joy comes from being able to give to others.

When economic hardship comes our way it is tempting to focus all of our energies on personal survival. But as followers of Jesus, shouldn't our attitude be different? When times are tough shouldn't we be more giving, just in case we lose our income and are left without anything to share?

The very essence of Christianity is based on generosity. "For God so loved the world...that He gave" (John 3:16). Jesus said, "He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for My sake will find it" (Matthew 10:39) NKJV. Again, "Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again" (Luke 6:38) NKJV.

When Jesus asked the Rich Young Ruler to sell all of his possessions and give to the poor, was He asking him to trade his life of luxury for that of a homeless vagabond? Was Jesus calling him to a life of abject poverty? I don't believe so. God has promised to provide for our needs. Rather, I believe God was calling the Young Ruler to change his world view--to become a giver instead of a getter.

There's nothing wrong with getting. In fact we cannot be givers without first getting. But in the process of getting it's easy to forget what the getting is for. Like the man in the Jesus' story who ran out of room to store his stuff, it's tempting to build bigger barns so that we can have more." It's tempting to believe the bumper sticker, "He who ends up with the most toys wins."

In God's world view getting is always for the purpose of giving.

In his letter to the Corinthians  Paul said,

"Now this I say, he who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully. Each one must do just as he has purposed in his heart, not grudgingly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed..." (2 Corinthians 9:6-8) NASB.

Notice that God blesses us with good gifts so that we, in turn, can bless others. God wants us to experience the joy that can only be experienced through personal generosity. There is nothing else like it.

Today, I am thankful for the many people who, over the years have extended love, patience, and material wealth to me. I am not a self-made man. I am not a rock or an island, but the product of an extended community of givers who willingly gave of themselves so that I could grow and develop. 

Now, if I can only be like them.

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Oil In My Lamp

There is much that I don't understand about the Parable of the Ten Bridesmaids. I'm not middle eastern and I've never been to a wedding where the attendants carried clay lamps or where the celebrations lasted for more than one day. But Jesus used one such event to illustrate the significance of being ready for His return. 

There were ten bridesmaids
Five were wise and five were foolish
The difference between the two centers around planning
The wise were cautious
The foolish did not anticipate a delay
They all slept

Oil Lamp - Stockxpert. All rights reserved.

Several key things I've learned from this parable include:

I need to plan ahead (life doesn't just happen)
I need to be deliberate about spiritual things
I cannot run on "fumes"
I need to let God fill my "tank" everyday
I need to be ready

Over the years I have also learned that I cannot be ready without God's help. I can only drill for the oil of God's Spirit and extract it from His word as He empowers me and blesses my efforts, otherwise I always come up dry.

Prayer: "Lord, please help me to be among those that You consider wise and ready."

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

I Am Thankful

On this Thanksgiving weekend, amidst the gravy, dressing and pie, I am grateful for the hope that Jesus brings to my heart. Recent violence in various parts of the world reminds me that there are people out there who do not value freedom of belief and expression. Their views of God are dogmatic and absolute. You either see things their way or you are deemed as evil and deserving of death. Unfortunately, this intolerance is not just confined to a few middle eastern religious fanatics. These same attitudes can be found in many religious groups throughout the world, including the U.S.

Thanksgiving Meal - Studiomill. All rights reserved.

Last year I attended a seminar in Altadena, CA where the presenter defined Modernism (from the Industrial Revolution to the mid 1980's) and Post-Modernism (from the mid 1980's to now) and detailed its impact on our present age. Particularly in the West, we enjoy a high level of tolerance that includes the acceptance of different beliefs and lifestyles. Even though I don't buy into the cultural attitudes and choices of many around me, I value our shared freedom of choice and support everyone's right to choose how they want to live (as long as they are not violating the rights of others).

At one point I asked the presenter what we can expect to see next. What comes after post-modernism? Without hesitation he said, Fundamentalism! Once society fully experiences the negative aspects of post-modern thinking and realizes that it cannot solve the world's pressing challenges it will swing hard back to the right and embrace Fundamentalism. I can see this already happening.

Fundamental thinking is less tolerant, more exacting and driven by prescribed authorities. Fundamentalist Christians and Muslims may differ in their specific beliefs, but they are very similar when it comes to their attitudes toward those they view as "unbelievers."

Trust me, you don't want to be on the receiving end of those who view themselves as God's emissaries of justice and truth. History is replete with examples of the disastrous impact such people have had on their communities.

Today, I am thankful that we still have religious freedom and that I can write about it. I am thankful for the quiet revolution of the heart that Jesus modeled and called His people to experience. I am thankful that Jesus is patient with me and others and that He does not use coercion and force to enlarge His kingdom. 

I am thankful that Jesus is not political and self-serving, and that He leads His followers to the higher path of service and humility. As one of Jesus' followers I am thankful that it is not my job to try and clean up the evil in the world, but rather my role is to be a loving, caring influence wherever I go.

Through the power of Jesus I am thankful that I can be the salt of the earth and make people thirsty for the Water of Life.

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Pathway to Freedom

To be made a slave is one of the worst things that can happen to a human being. To be denied the freedom to go where you want and pursue your dreams is a tragedy beyond comprehension. The slave industry that existed in this country (which was largely practiced by "Christians") is proof that foul versions of Christianity can be developed by those who wish to justify their actions--whatever they may be.

Slaves - Dreamstime Photos. All rights reserved.

The famous Boston theologian, Cotton Mather, in 1693 included in his "Rules for the Society of the Negroes" the notion that "Negroes were enslaved because they had sinned against God." Where did he get this? Certainly not in scripture! Unfortunately, there are still "Christians" who believe this today, although I would like to think their number is deceasing.

Why do we as humans have such a difficult time breaking with the past; of throwing out beliefs and habits that cannot be supported by scripture? What am I believing and doing today that fits into this category? Is my idea of worship and church scriptural, or is it mostly tradition?

My Personal Journey

I grew up in the south in the early fifties with distinct memories of "colored" bathrooms and drinking fountains. As a child I had no clue what the blacks were up against. I just knew that the white people in power kept saying blacks needed to be kept separate. I saw and heard references to this in my own family. While my parents never made this distinction, my grandparents certainly did. I resisted their narrow thinking.

When I went to college I roomed with one of my best friends who belonged to a respected black family from Blakely, GA. It was a great experience. I still have fond memories of those times and of his brother and sister, whom I thought of a close friends.

As a new pastor I ended up in Florida, which some say is more cosmopolitan that the rest of the south. While this may be true, I saw clear evidence in the mid-70s that there were still strong lines of demarcation. I pastored for 7.5 years in the Florida Conference and never knew the black Adventist pastors who lived and pastored in my community. We were not prohibited from getting to know them, but neither were we encouraged (at least I don't have memory of it). Simply put, "they had their churches, and we had ours." Thank God, I've heard things are different today.

Now as I look back on that experience, I am ashamed that I didn't make an effort to get to know and fellowship with the black Adventist pastors who lived and ministered in my community.

One day, while pastoring a small church in north Florida, my 65 year-old head deacon announced that if I integrated the church and baptized any blacks, he would leave. When I pressed him for his reasons, he stated that it was not "proper for blacks and whites to mix." He went on to say that "they have their place, and we have ours." Of course such thinking is not biblical. In fact, it is anti-Christian! We went ahead and baptized some wonderful black members into that church and were thankful that this deacon's views were not held by the majority in the church.

Seeing as God Sees

I'm looking forward to the day when there are no lines of distinction; when people are simply people--regardless of the color of their skin, or national origin. I often think, when God looks at our world He doesn't see national boundaries. He doesn't think of people as Germans, Japanese, South Africans or Americans. He doesn't identify them as Republicans or Democrats. He doesn't even see denominational lines. He simply sees His children, the people of His creation; members of His family--even though some are confused and lost.

The problem

Until we are able to see and love as God does, we are ravaged by the evils of distorted perspective and lost in sin. We are still controlled by the powers of darkness who long to keep us from experiencing God's amazing freedom.

But when we do see--when God performs His miracle of grace in our lives, and the scales begin to fall from our eyes, then we are FREE! Then, with Paul we can say:

"Whatever we used to be with our old sinful ways has been nailed to the cross. So our entire record of sin has been canceled, and we no longer have to bow down to sin's power" (Romans 6:6) The Voice.

"God, I want to experience this kind of freedom. I want to see as You see, to love as You love--today!"

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services

Kissing Jesus

Who is the last person you kissed? Was it your wife, your husband, or maybe your child? How about it kids, was the last person you kissed your mom or dad? Or, maybe your sister or brother? Typically, in this part of the world, we only kiss the people we love or are close to. Kissing is a sign of friendship and affection.

Mature Couple Kissing. Dreamstime. All rights reserved 2009.

Of course not all kisses are the same.

In some parts of the world, kissing, particularly cheek kissing, is used as a ritual or social gesture to indicate friendship, perform a greeting, to confer congratulations, to comfort someone, or to show respect.*

In our part of the world it is customary for people to kiss when greeting or parting (especially if they haven't seen, or won't see each other, for prolonged periods of time).

Romantic kissing is what people do who are in love. They usually kiss each other on the lips and sometimes forget to breath! Or, so it seems.

Kissing has played a significant role in religion.

* Muslims may kiss the Black Stone during Hajj (pilgrimage to Mecca).

* In Ancient Rome and some modern Pagan beliefs, worshipers when passing the statue or image of a god or goddess will kiss their hand and wave it towards the deity (adoration).

* In the gospels of Matthew and Mark (Luke and John omit this) Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss—an instance of a kiss intertwined with betrayal. This is the basis of the term 'the kiss of Judas'

* The holy kiss or kiss of peace is a traditional part of most Christian liturgies, though usually replaced with a handshake today in Western cultures

* The pope will kiss the ground on arrival to a new country.

* Visitors to the pope traditionally kiss his foot. (The ring of a cardinal or bishop, hand of a priest.)

* Jews will kiss the Western wall of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem, and other religious articles during prayer such as the Torah, usually by touching their hand, Tallis, or Siddur (prayerbook) to the Torah and then kissing it. Jewish law prohibits kissing members of the opposite sex, except for certain close relatives.

* Eastern Orthodox and Eastern Catholic Christians often kiss the icons around the church as entering, they will also kiss the cross and / or the priests hand in certain other customs in the Church, such as confession or receiving a blessing.

* Catholics will kiss rosary beads as a part of prayer, or kiss their hand after making the sign of the cross. It is also common to kiss the wounds on a crucifix, or any other image of Christ's Passion.

* Hindus sometimes kiss the ground of a temple.

* Above material excerpted from Wikipedia

Is it possible to kiss crosses, rosary beads, and holy icons and not mean anything by it? Of course. We call this hypocrisy?

Is it possible to kiss someone and not mean anything by it? Of course. Sometimes people kiss each other in romantic ways but they don't really love each other. A number of years ago Tina Turner sang a popular song that asked the question, "What's Love Got to Do With It?"

What`s love got to do, got to do with it?
What's love but a second hand emotion?
What`s love but a sweet old fashioned notion?
What`s love got to do, got to do with it?
Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken?

This describes people going through the motions of being in love, but it's all make believe. Instead of truly "making love" they are "making believe they're in love."

Running Away From Love

When I was sixteen years old I didn't know very much about love. If you asked my wife today, she'd probably tell you I still have a lot to learn. But when I was in the ninth grade I decided I didn't need my parent's love, or the love of my church, so I run away from both.

A friend and I boarded a plane in Orlando, Florida and flew to San Antonio, Texas where we stayed for a couple of months. I can assure you we didn't kiss our parents goodbye. In fact, ten days went by before we even told them where we were. Foolishly, I believed I could find happiness apart from my family and God. Unknowingly, I was singing the song, "What's love got to do with it?"

The last person I wanted anything to do with was Jesus Christ! In my mind He symbolized everything I wanted to be liberated from. In essence, I kissed Jesus goodbye, but not with a desire to ever see Him again. Fortunately, He didn't hold me to it.

In one way or the other we are all kissing Jesus. The question is, what do our kisses really mean?

By Rich DuBose, Director, Pacific Union Conference Church Support Services